Just wondering… Where are you on your journey?
In spite of the depth of my depression, there is one I can hold onto. My triune God. Three in one. Amazing, isn’t it, that there can exist such a Godhead. I will be the first to admit that it took some time for me to comprehend such an entity.
My faith has not always been so strong. There were too many years of believing in mind, but not holding on with my heart. That changed one day when I had a near death experience. Something happened that day, which destroyed me psychologically. An event that left me not caring for life anymore, and shook me to my very core. I went home that day, and laid down on my bed, and yelled out loud, “Lord, IF you are there, then take me home, there is nothing left for me here”.
He held me on His lap as a very small child, and held my head to His breast. Gave me the love I so desperately needed right then, along with a life review. After a few questions I was allowed to ask, He said He was opening a door for me, then sent me back, as it was not yet my time. All I found, was a hole in the floor, which I mentally crawled into. It wasn’t until ten years later that He opened that door for me, and it was certainly not what I expected.
It was the door I had not been able to open on my own. it was that door to my past abuse.
It had taken over four years of homelessness, more years of self recrimination and self abuse, and finally coming to stand with Him in an unshakable faith. During that time period the emotional turmoil, and pain, was simply unimaginable.
I really do not know why I am here today, other than to share His Word. That, and try to be there for others that are struggling.
There just simply is not much of life I have not experienced first hand.
Please, take a minute to share yourself here. To say where your faith is, and how He has helped you grow.
By the way, I strive to be as Paul, the Apostle. My depression is the thorn in my side. I pray that my faith will continue to grow, in spite of it.
If you are not yet bold enough to share it publicly, write me at firstname.lastname@example.org